Call Me Tender-Hearted

I am writing with a heavy heart.  So many things are going on, in my life, in the world around me, and beyond.  All I can do is feel.  Sympathize.  Try to understand people’s actions, or lack thereof.  Share in others’ sorrows.  Relate to them in some way.  Wanting to reach out.

Everything I read, everything I hear is rendering me frozen with empathy.  Waves of emotion have been knocking me down this week.  Do I need to feel bitter?  Heart-broken?  Angry?

No.  But I can’t help it.

I’m a sensitive person.  I can’t help but feel something in the wake of unfavorable news.  

Sadness.  Anger.  Broken-hearted.  Disappointment.  Despair.

When I linger on it long enough, it’ll work its way out of my heart.  I eventually come through it and see that everything is going to be okay.  It’s not possible for my heart to occupy such a strong emotion for too long.  I suppose this is a good thing.

Optimism usually pulls me together.    

Look up.  It’s going to be okay.  Things aren’t always this way.

I have to believe this.  Throughout all of my life experiences, it has been true.

Some of you may be wondering what is going on.  There isn’t one event, but many.   News stories I’ve read, things that I’ve come across in real life.   People that I can’t change.  Things that I have absolutely no control over. 

And even though this has been established, I can’t help but feel.  I can’t shut it off.

As I sit here drinking my coffee this morning, I am trying to work through these emotions.  I’ve been quite pensive, spending time reflecting.  Sorting out my feelings.  Despising the fact that I am tender-hearted.  Searching for positivity.  Trying to lure it out of it’s week-long slumber so that it can rescue me from this deeply emotional funk. 

Excuse me while I have a moment.

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